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🗽 Seven days: Thinking of the old folks - LylesBrother - Return to the USA

1,877 views · Published 16 December 2013 · 8:44 · Indexed 15 October 2026

Channel: ☀️softypapa · 2013 · People & Blogs

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🗽 Use the link below to see the blog post associated with this video:
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Let's tick off another day in the countdown towards the job interview which may change everything for my family and me. In this blog I want to talk about the challenges of knowing what's best to do in the interest of the old folks in our family. To be exact my wife has a father and mother and I have a mother, all of whom are now in their 70's and edging ever nearer the point of requiring more and better attention. My wife Yumiko's mother has Alzheimer's disease and though she's doing pretty well she nevertheless requires fairly constant observation to ensure she does not hurt herself or wander away and become lost. This happened a few years back after she was invited to a friend's home for tea some kilometers away. At the end of the party mom simply excused herself, left the home and began trek away into the hills behind the home. She left on this adventure in near freezing weather and without a jacket. As night began to fall our family began a frantic search, alerting the local police and eventually finding her before she became too cold. Her husband is still quite able-bodied though he is also not as in touch with reality as he was a few decades back and we all know that both mom and dad will do better with constant supervision at a distance. What I mean by "at a distance" is that the caregiver need not be actively on top of them at all times and can instead simply be near at hand and aware of what it going on.

My own mother is still quite independent though I worry greatly for her well-being as she often will not tell me of her real needs and she's struggling to get by on very little in one of the most expensive areas of the United States (California). My brother is nearby though he's pretty busy caring for his young family and I think it would be best if both he and I were in the area to look after mom together.

So what to do as we plan and prepare for this move? Though we are already pretty far down the road of making up our minds about moving back to the USA, Yumiko and I are nevertheless reexamining our options and second-guessing our earlier decisions. Should we remain in Japan or go back to the USA?

I found it helpful to break things down into the facts of our situation in attempting to resolve this issue. Here's what I have to work with:

1. We have three senior (70's+) parents who's welfare needs to be considered.

2. We have six adult children on who's shoulders this responsibility rests. Currently five of the adult kids are in Japan, living within walking distance of our Japanese parents. Just one of the adult kids is living in the USA within a few hours driving distance of our USA mom.

Given this situation I think it would be best for my family and I to return to the USA, if anything to simply provide a better balance and human-resource distribution to care for our USA mother. This would essentially give us a situation with three adult kids (two really as one is rather useless) in Japan and two in the USA. Another benefit of making this move will be the improved financial situation it will create for my immediate family which will make it possible for us to offer more and better assistance to our parents on both sides of the Pacific.

With this simple reasoning I think it's best for us to move.

🗽 In "Seven Days: Thinking of the Old Folks," part of the "Return to the USA" series, Kurt delves into the poignant memories and considerations of leaving behind the older generation as he prepares for his move back to America. This episode is a touching tribute to the elders who have shaped his life and a reflection on the bittersweet nature of major life transitions.

As the countdown continues, Kurt grapples with the emotional weight of leaving parents and mentors, acknowledging their influence and the legacy they leave behind. It's a journey through gratitude, respect, and the inevitable passage of time. Join him in this introspective episode as he pays homage to the wisdom and love of the older generation while embracing the new chapter ahead. 🇺🇸👴👵💭

➡️ Discover insights into life's transitions in Kurt's book, Going Alone: https://a.co/d/6SORY8N

🌐 Website: https://goingalone.org
📧 Email: [email protected]
👍 Support Kurt's storytelling and reflections on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/softypapa

Be safe... But not too safe.

#KurtBell #FamilyLegacy #Elders #ReturnToUSA 🗽🕰️🌳

CREDITS:
"Japanese Falls" image: Lane Brown | View More: http://lanebrownart.blogspot.com/p/portfolio.html
"Song For Kurt" theme: Nowherians | Listen Here: http://nowherians.bandcamp.com/

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