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Step 4: How To End A Relationship Series - Get Space

4,276 views · Published 12 June 2015 · 2:28 · Indexed 26 October 2026

Channel: Clayton Olson Coaching · 2015 · Film & Animation

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“Step 4: How To End A Relationship - Get Space”

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This is the 4th installment to the How to End a Relationship video series. This step is all about getting space.

In case you missed the first 3 steps, please see below:

Step 1: How to End a Relationship Gracefully in 7 Steps - Stop Blaming Them: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0mxotOQ_PM 

Step 2: How to End a Relationship – Write Yourself a Letter: https://youtu.be/okqEpEv1fPg

Step 3: How to End a Relationship – Build a Support Network: https://youtu.be/NXxDFK5_Imc

Hey welcome to Step 4 of the How to Breakup with Someone You Love video series. 

And this step is all about Getting Space. 

It may be easy or difficult depending on your living situation. If you live with them it is critical that you get out of the house. You can either go to a friend's house, a family member's house or you rent a place in AirBnB, get a hotel somewhere but get out for a few days immediately following the breakup. 

The reason being is because what's going to happen, and what happened for me I'll give you my personal story when my relationship with my girlfriend of 4 years ended who lived with me. We found ourselves consoling one another during the time of the breakup.  Although that sounds nice and it sounds like "we should because we love each other" it was in complete competition with the commitment that we made with one another which is to end the relationship. All it did was it left both of us feeling confused and every single time that we were in each other’s presence it just reopened the wound all over again. It made things incredibly confusing and rather than taking steps forward in respecting the decision to breakup, it felt like we were just running in place or taking steps backwards. I ended up going to a friend's house she ended up moving out and really it was the best thing that we could have done to preserve a future friendship. 

The reason being is because whether or not you're going to be friends with your ex after the breakup it has nothing to do with your current relationship right now. It has very little to do with your current relationship right now. It has lot more to do with the actions that the two of you take immediately following the breakup because a lot of times this happens is when two of you are very vulnerable that's when attacks happen, that's when people end up getting defensive, that's when blame is thrown around. 

The faster you can remove yourself from that situation where you’re dealing with this very unstable relationship, you are able to give the person the respect to figure things out on their own and recruit their own support system while you're doing the same thing for yours. And then if at a later date the two of are going to talk, you can come back from a place of not being emotional about it; or being let's say, less emotional about it. 

That's step number 4 get space.

Don’t forget to download my FREE “8 Secrets to Create a Rock Solid Relationship”:
http://claytonolsoncoaching.com/ 
This eBook will walk you through the top secrets to build a healthy solid relationship that stands the test of time.

In your corner,

Clayton

Need Immediate 1-on-1 Custom-Tailored Coaching? Click here to schedule: https://claytonolsoncoaching.com/1-hour-relationship-coaching-session

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