Look Who it Was Random video

TW: Struggling to Record Outside Due to Continued Targeting Pt 1 (More Info In Description)

4,053 views · Published 8 November 2018 · 5:49 · Indexed 11 October 2026

Channel: Dylan Groves · 2018 · People & Blogs

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Hi everyone, this is Kayvon and Katy, and this is the first part of a three-part video in which we talk about our ongoing struggles to record videos in the face of Mk Ultra targeting.

Parts 2 and 3 can be found here: https://youtu.be/vir_QpAtJ3I and here: https://youtu.be/TRFhpKRvVVk

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Some potentially triggering topics mentioned include: structural dissociation and integration, being drugged, directed energy weapons, Mk Ultra targeting

Some potentially triggering instances of background noise include:

At 1:34, the sound of a child on a swing can be heard. This sound continued throughout the rest of the recording. For those who have triggers related to specific musical notes who would find this helpful, the sound oscillated between approximately four and five whole steps above middle c.

At 1:39, I noticed that the person who had just walked past me a few minutes before and who I was about to talk about then was walking towards me again, so I said "hold on" and chose to pause until they were a reasonable distance away. At 1:57, I resumed talking again.

At 3:49, the truck of the person mentioned above can be heard loudly starting. It did not stop making audible noise until 4:35 when it had driven away. During that time, I also adjusted my hat twice. Each time, I gave warning and turned the camera away, but realized afterwards that the way I did so may be triggering as well (people who have triggers around duality programming may want to watch the section from 4:13-4:35 with extra caution). 

At 5:19, the sound of a horn can be heard. It sounded like two notes at once, one about five whole steps above middle c and one a halfstep above that.

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In our last video, we talked about our struggle to record videos in our apartment because of targeting we were experiencing there. For anyone who hasn't seen it, you can watch it here:

TW: Why We'll Now Be Consistently Recording Our Videos Outside (Mk Survivor w/Polyfragmented DID) - https://youtu.be/sPgvH205q8c

But now that we've publicized our choice to record outside, we are experiencing what seems like worse targeting when recording outside than we were before.

That does not mean we are going to start recording indoors again. We aren't. We're just going to have to work on improving our coping skills, so that the level of stress and glitching that occurred in this video (specifically in the second and third parts) doesn't continue when we try to make videos in the future. That is something we will say more about, however, in upcoming videos in our Healthy Coping Tools series.

It actually seems like when we have tried to make Healthy Coping videos, we have experienced increased targeting. It seems to us like our abusers really don't want us to make them. In some ways, this understanding has given us increased motivation to. In other ways, we have genuinely been set back. 

But now, we are choosing to channel everything we have into making them and hope to make several Healthy Coping Tools videos before making anything else. Even though they generally get less views than our other more trauma-focused content, some of you guys have expressed serious desire to see more of them and we do not want to let you down.

We are also going to be putting a new level of effort into emailing again. It has been a terrible struggle for us lately to disengage from the comments sections and correspond with others more individually instead. We have continued to reply to some people's emails in the last few weeks, but very minimally. 

One reason for this has been ongoing email harassment from someone we talked about in another recent video: 

TW: Coping With a Delusional Subscriber Who Is Fixated On Me (Mk Survivor w/Polyfragmented DID) - https://youtu.be/pF_heLLi7OM

But at this point, we think the main reason is that our abusers have been using the comments sections to engage us in arguments about our credibility and generally traumatize/anger us to where we do not have the time or energy to give others, specifically survivors, the individual time they need. 

We have been aware of this and doing inner work around it for awhile, but have only now felt ourselves disengage enough to return to our emails with any kind of renewed strength.

I am tired of being crippled by all of the ongoing trauma and I promise those of you who have reached out to me in search of help or friendship, I will get back to you as soon as I am able.

Helping you is way more important than arguing with the abusers who target me in the comments and if it wasn't for the activators they put in their usernames, pictures and comments that have been triggering me to engage with them, I would have been giving you a lot more time.

~ Katy & co.

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Update about our name change: https://youtu.be.com/RgTi07WrOH4

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